Sunday, March 29, 2009

Feta cheese

I love wearing skirts. They make me feel confident, professional and wicked-fierce. But my love for skirts goes hand in hand with my hatred for pantyhose. Every time I want sport my pencil skirt to work, my morning starts off with 20 minutes of heavy breathing, sweating, tucking and squishing - just trying to get a brand new pair of pantyhose on. I'm OK until I get past my knees. The second half is when the battle starts. I feel like I'm trying to fit a sausage into a skin made for a hot dog. And the fact that the top of my pantyhose (once I'm finally finished with the excruciating process of getting them on in the first place) ends about seven inches above my bellybutton and every time I sit, I feel it rolling back down - does not make them any more comfortable.

Well all of this is no more! I have discovered something that will change my life... at least so I thought at the time.

During one of my regular visits to Shopper's Drug Mart, I came across these fancy stay-up stockings, lined with a thin layer of transparent rubber at the top that are said to stay up on their own, therefore eliminating sausage-stuffing mornings from my routine. Well they lie.

On a warm Monday of last week - fairly warm - I wore this brand new pair of stockings, feeling great in my skirt. By great I mean confident, professional and wicked-fierce. I went for a walk at lunch because I needed to pick up a few things. After I was far enough from the office that I couldn't easily go back in a mad, desperate dash, I could feel the stockings slowly starting to slide down my legs. Now I bought the same size I always buy in pantyhose and they fit great until about 1 p.m. hit. Is it possible that I lost about 5 lbs between 7:30 a.m. and lunch? If only it were that easy...

As I keep walking, the stockings keep creeping down. My coat was fairly long, but not long enough. I would hop into stores and hide between the isles to secretly adjust my new find that was supposed to 'change my life.' My walk slowed down to a stroll in an attempt to avoid any sudden movements that can possibly speed up the cascading of the stockings. Suddenly my legs start feeling a bit colder... I'm walking to Metro now to pick up a low-fat, minimum calorie flavour-free salad. As I walk up to the entrance I catch a glimpse of my reflection in the glass door. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Sure enough, the stockings slid down as far as my boots would let them and the dark, lacy, rubber-covered tops were at full view to all on Bloor Street. I hid behind the store, yanked them up and unfazed, continued on my quest for rabbit food. After seven more attempts at inconspicuously adjusting myself in the cereal isle, I gave up. I hid in the parking lot, pulled down my stockings and tucked them into my boots, exposing the poor people of down town Toronto (not to mention my office buddies) to my feta-cheese white legs.

Nothing will change my admiration for skirts - and for stockings? Next time I'll remember to buy a smaller size...

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Ms. Spears in the T-dot

Last week, on Wednesday and Thursday, Ms. Spears hit Toronto one more time.

As a self-proclaimed Britney Spears super-fan, I was there, front row centre (ok, maybe a bit to the right) with my purse full of concert swag and memorabilia. I have been looking forward to this concert for months! With my VIP ticket in hand, all the Circus lyrics memorized, I was ready to be wowed. And I definitely was - by everyone but Britney.

The show started off with a performance by the Pussycat Dolls, which was phenomenal. They only sang a couple of numbers, but sounded stellar and danced the daylights out of that stage. After PCD, and following the Circus theme, the audience was entertained by circus performers, acrobats and contortionists. And then it was time. With the audience screaming and cheering, lights blaring, there she was. Brit brit herself. Introduced by Perez Hilton in "Elizabeth" drag on the large screens, announcing the return of Ms. Spears. After the initial wow factor of "Omigod she's actually here!" the audience seemed to quiet down and watch the long awaited performance.

She was on stage for about 90 minutes, performing everything from new Circus tracks, to the ever-famous 'Hit Me Baby One More Time.' Her dancers were unreal! Accompanied by the occasional circus performer as well, the overall performance was definitely worth every penny!
Britney however, pranced and strutted on the Circus-like stage, occasionally hitting her marks. She knew the choreography, that's for sure, but she lacked the drive, effort and excitement to make this performance unforgettable. After a solid 90 minute performance, there wasn't a drop of sweat to be seen on her. And I was sitting damn close.

We all know she doesn't sing on stage, but before she seemed to have an excuse. She was always known for fierce choreography, skilled dance routines and was thought of as an 'entertainer.' This time, the sweaty, heavy-breathing-snake-carrying Britney didn't show up for the concert. Instead, the audience got to watch her change her outfit at least 12 times, wave her arms here and there, toss her hair around and the occasional high kick.

I saw her a number of years ago when the Onyx Hotel Tour came to Toronto and that's when I fell in love with her as an entertainer and a performer. Circus, however, did not compare to that performance.

I'm still a huge fan - I wore my concert T-shirt proudly to work on casual Friday. But to say that this is definitely her big comeback is a bit of a stretch.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

The new kid in town?

Last weekend I finally had plans with a girlfriend of mine whom I haven't seen since my birthday - which was in September. We were going to an event on Queen Street and since we both met up right after work, we were looking for a place to grab a bite to eat, and more importantly, a bottle of wine. After walking along for a few minutes, enjoying the fresh air and a few cigarettes, we stumbled upon a dark, sexy looking place with dim lights and what looked to be a stocked bar. Why not?

After we walk in, a very nice gentleman takes our coats and shows us to our seats. The place is very well decorated, they're playing a fantastic playlist. The menu is projected on the back wall a la slideshow and the dishes sound superb. I'm fairly new to this 'fine dining' thing, I'm more than content with some honey garlic chicken wings and a pint of Steamwhistle. But this place was something else.

It was called BarChef. This new kid in town apparently joined the Queen Street neighbourhood in December. Right between Spadina and Bathurst.

We were greeted with some sort of a concoction that consisted of what resembled three tapioca pearls and a lot of foam. The foam was said to be lime flavoured and we 'had to take it all in one gulp, hold it in our mouth for a few seconds, then swallow.' I'm sorry? With the waiter watching? These little spoonies were quite large and if I'm going to be gulping unknown substances, I'd rather not have some stranger's eyes on me the whole time, thank you very much.

One one, two, three - we both down the mixture, hold it in for three seconds and swallow. WOW! The lemon/lime foam mixed with the pearls to create the most amazing taste and miraculously shrunk in my mouth and ended up being a small teaspoon of heaven.

That's one of the things BarChef is said to be know for, as explained to us by our server Gordon. BarChef focuses on 'molecular mixology' - they're not just bartenders over there. According to Martiniboys.com, BarChef mixologists are "working with a product called Textura, produced by a Spanish restaurant called Elbouli, Solarik [one of the owners and mixologists at BarChef] creates bubbles, kind of like an egg yolk, that explode in your mouth."

Three phenomenal dishes (and two bottles of wine) later, we can't stop talking about this place! Amazing service, mouthwatering food and a beverage list that will make anyone choose to cab it home - you'll definitely see me at BarChef again.
**photos courtesy of barcheftoronto.com